Sacred Feminine Goddess Protector

It’s funny how certain people who crossed my path earlier in life have continued to influence me. Sometimes I look back and wonder why they didn’t just snuff my life out when they had the chance. Other times I am in awe of just how amazing they truly were.

One such person was my fourth grade teacher, and later my high school principal. They are/were one in the same.

Fourth grade was probably one of my favorite years in school. I don’t really know what it was about the lady who was running the show. Maybe it had more to do with the eclectic mix of kids in our classroom. Whatever it was, it was a fun year.

I wasn’t the perfect kid, but I was a rule follower….so long as the rules didn’t interfere with what I wanted or needed. On the rare occasion when I did something stupid enough to warrant being in trouble (or actually got caught at it), this lady who’s energy was simultaneously all business and all fun would find a way to correct me without breaking my spirit.

I couldn’t see it then, but for some reason this morning I am recognizing it in so many ways.

Later in high school, this woman who had become the first female principal (and high school at that) in our small old fashioned town, had my back in an incident where I have often thought she should have nailed me to the ground. I sometimes think if it had been anyone else, that’s exactly what would have happened. Others had very different experiences with her. She was quite controversial during her tenure.  My experience was my experience.

And yet, this morning, I realize that in her own imperfect way she was in fact protecting and maybe even feeding that fire of sacred feminine goddess that burned inside me.

I have been reading a lot of material lately on the feminine spirit and how it is so systematically shaped and molded to fit the expectations and purposes of a male-dominated society. I think of the many times I have had the courage to speak up about something I perceived to be an injustice or ignorant obliviousness. In the same moment, I think of all the times that speaking up was met with a strong resistance, admonition to keep quiet and mind my own business, a manipulative threat of financial or social harm, or other retaliation. It has certainly soured me towards male leadership, though women leaders are just as capable of such.

To this day, when I encounter this woman from my past, her strong protective and feisty goddess spirit permeates the fullness of whatever environment she occupies. I have found that I am almost uncomfortable with her “upfrontness”. It is not always polite and politically correct. I squirm a bit when she points out that which is less than it should be.

However, this morning I realize that her boldness is calling me to be myself. It has been calling me since fourth grade.

It’s time to wake up and step into the sacred feminine divinity that is my birthright and that of the four beautiful women I birthed.

2 Responses to “Sacred Feminine Goddess Protector”

  • Love this, Angie! As will your daughters…

  • In my tweaking after posting, I found something that I am going to share in A Conversational Space. I felt compelled to add a line, possibly after you read it: “….though women leaders are just as capable of such.” There is something here that isn’t quite settled for me yet.

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