Authentic Angie
February 24, 2009
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Mid-Life is such a fun time….and a confusing time….and a brave time….and…and…It really just rocks. Mid-life for me is the point at which I have realized it’s okay to be authentically me. What does that mean? Well, for me it means being who I really am. It means that being a nice person is okay, but I don’t have to squash who I am to please other people. It means that I don’t have to apologize for having an opinion just because someone else thinks I am wrong. Being authentically me means being free to be me, and freedom is so important at this stage of my life.
I learned very early on that to be accepted by the “pretty people” meant I had to conform to their view of what was acceptable no matter how stupid or rediculous their views seemed to be. Not doing so created unbearable social pain for me, and I didn’t handle social pain very well. I guess most kids don’t. As a twenty-something, I conformed because I wanted to get a job and then please my superiors. Sadly, it wasn’t because I WANTED to please everyone as much as it was because I was AFRAID of the consequences if I did not please everyone. On those rare occasions when an Authentic Angie showed up, I was quickly admonished and put back in my place.
Over the years, Authentic Angie has reared her head from time to time. She never intends to cause pain for someone else, but often attempts to help bear someone else’s pain or help someone get relief. In return, there it is…some sort of social discomfort as payback for being authentically me. Now at life’s mid-point, I find that I truly want to be authentically me and not care what anyone else thinks. I think it is time. I find that those who try to squash authenticism are themselves feeling threatened, so why would I hand over my emotional confidence to another insecure individual?
Authentic Angie is emerging. She is coming forth with confidence, dignity, and purpose. Those who would seek to squash that drive should consider themselves warned….better step out of the way. Authentic Angie is shining through and there is nothing going to stop her from being her authentic self.
How does your authentic self shine through?
