Thoughts on the Elderly
Younger generations don’t often recognize the stress and trauma our elders endure when their spouse crosses over. It’s compounded in unbelievable ways when the one who remains behind falls one too many times and the children decide it is time to move them to an assisted care facility. Even when it makes sense, when it’s in the best interest of the elderly for their own safety, the emotional toll is worse than death.
Yesterday, I helped one such sweet lady escape her nice, safe, comfortable prison for a few hours to seek help from an alternative practitioner for the toll this stress had taken on her body. It was an emotional release that was a bit unexpected. She is such a strong woman, who has held it together and put on a happy face for everyone who walks through her door.
I had no idea her wounds were so fresh. I knew her husband had crossed over, but I didn’t realize how recently it had happened. And I didn’t realize how quickly she had been moved out of her home. I also didn’t realize that I was taking her on her first out-of-town trip since all of this had happened. It was overwhelming.
My heart breaks for her.
To my knowledge, these people are never given appropriate mental health support, only meds to help them sleep through the nightmares and forget how sucky life just got.
And grief counseling for a 90 year old?
Probably not gonna happen.
Oh, and I officially SUCK as a daughter-in-law.
Why is it easier for me to show compassion to someone else’s family than it is my own?
And why do we insist on keeping people alive when they really want to be allowed to go? Nature tends to create multiple opportunities for their escape, yet we believe we are doing them a favor by treating the illness instead of letting it take them.
I just don’t know how I feel about it.
I think that you are channeling my thoughts somehow!!! Everything u write about are my exact feeling and thoughts!!! Loloh well, at least I don’t have to type it…teehee! Lol
It’s kinda funny that I just happened upon this after the last few months my family and I have had. My 99 year old great-grandmother just passed away on the 11th. And she lived in her own home with her own daughter taking care of her til the very end. She lived 33 years after her husband passed away and I can’t imagine how hard that must have been for her, seeing as how she had been ready to pass on since the 90’s.
Wow. Now that’s a long time to be here. It’s amazing that her daughter was able to take care of her. So many these days reach the point where either no one is left nearby to take care of them or their health deteriorates so much it is simply impossible. Kudos to your family for keeping that one piece of the stress to a minimum.
It nearly was impossible. I honestly have no idea how my grandma did it. But I’ve decided I’m not gonna get that old.
Sorta makes a hemlock cocktail sound appealing after age 85, doesn’t it?