The Ultimate Challenge
As lunchtime rolled around today and my one scheduled massage was over, I made my way back to the house where we sleep (we are currently occupying three houses in some form or fashion, thus I must somehow differentiate to keep you totally confused). I felt compelled to retrieve a portion of the insane mountain of laundry that threatens to suffocate the life out of my family, and take it to the other two houses to wash, dry, and fold…
…And to convince my husband that I am occasionally good for something other than all-to-infrequent amusement for him.
Upon arriving in the driveway of the bunkhouse, I noticed some sort of flyer stuffed into the handle on the storm door.
My brain in assume mode: “Hmm….must be a Seventh Day Adventist recruitment day.”
My brain upon seeing the goods: “Oh wow! Apparently it is (insert my brand of faith heritage here) recruitment day.”
My brain then being sarcastic: “This oughta be good.”
So I grabbed it, loaded the laundry, and brought the pamphlets back to the wellness center with me for some afternoon entertainment. After all, I still like those people. I’ve heard they are doing some things differently. Who knows?
First flyer: (semi-colons are my friend today) “…His church was never intended to be a building, or a large, multinational religious conglomerate, or an organization of human origin and motivation.” Sounds good so far.
Unfortunately, I can’t help wondering if the auditorium is still too sacred to allow a musical instrument through the doors.
Next paragraph: “The church which belongs to Jesus is people who seek to follow His will in the simplicity of the worship He desires…..”
Really? Okay all you Bible scholars in my fan club (Anyone? Someone? Oh surely one of you reads this crap just to see how far off my rocker I’ve gone!).
Did Jesus REALLY desire to be worshiped? That’s right. Jesus. The one who walked on the earth. The one who preached love as the greatest commandment. THAT Jesus. Did HE really want humans to worship HIM????? If so, PLEASE put a scripture in the comment section.
I would suggest that he did NOT desire to be worshiped, but rather was pointing the way to a higher power.
It continues: “Jesus, the Son of God, expects Christians to follow Him in His example to worship the Father without all the fanfare, the frenzy, the loudness, the garishness of so much that passes for worship nowadays….Then you are invited to worship with a congregation of people who are striving to be Christians without the inventions of man-made ideas and doctrines; a people whose authority for matters of worship, of practice, of faith is the Word of God alone…a family who attempts to avoid incumberances developed by human councils and creeds.”
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!
I didn’t know whether to be appalled or proud of the fact that they had so ingeniously put a new spin on the legalism with which I grew up.
At that point, I recalled a comment I recently made to a friend after she suggested it might be a bit unethical to go out of town to attend church when there are perfectly good churches right here in Smallville. I indicated that it was highly unlikely I would attend a church service in our community anytime soon, and for that matter, somewhat unlikely that I would attend one anywhere else.
The shocked and stunned look on her face prompted me to share my reasoning. We all claim to be Christian. We all claim to want to emulate Jesus as closely as we can. With Jesus, there were no walls, no buildings to maintain, no utility bills to pay, no preacher’s salaries. “Jesus” wasn’t the multi-billion dollar business with tax-exempt status that is our religious reality today.
I simply choose not to be a part of that portion of our national economy.
Jesus was a man who had something everyone else wanted. Jesus didn’t start a war. Jesus didn’t take a stand on illegal immigration. For that matter, he was himself an illegal immigrant at a few points in his life. Jesus didn’t convict, condemn, or crusade. He didn’t blow up people with whom he disagreed in the name of God and religion.
Jesus taught people how to be decent human beings.
And he pissed off the legalists whose self-serving rules he broke on a regular basis.
If a “church” wants to worship the way Jesus intended, then maybe they oughta ditch group service, go out on the prairie individually, and connect with The Source….like Jesus did.
If a group of people truly desire to be like Jesus, then maybe they oughta ditch the Peter and Paul crap that seems to be an endless source of division and focus on being like Jesus.
Heck even Jesus recognized the constant tendencies of his man-posse to get into power struggles. Why can’t we see it? Oh yeah….because we are convinced they were divinely inspired. Whatever. Just remember, they were writing their own stories. How would you write your autobiography? “I was a childish, power hungry jerk and never completely got over it,” or “What I say is THE Word of God, so you’d better listen to ME!”
If said group truly wants a relationship with the Universal Power, then maybe they should sell all their possessions and share with the poor. That would include selling the church building, equipment, vans/buses, and ditching the preacher and secretary so that money could be better spent being like Jesus.
Ouch.
I live in a town of 5000 individuals. Ten percent of those are imprisoned on the edge of town and don’t have many choices as to where they practice their religious beliefs. The remaining 4500 have established no less than 20 different religious organizations, most of which meet at the same time and same day of the week, each supporting the organizations’ expenses with their tithes. That means twenty different groups all claiming the title Christian, all claiming to worship one God, all claiming Jesus Christ as their savior, all so freakin’ self-centered in their beliefs on what constitutes a proper worship service that they waste a butt load of money so we can all “have it our way”.
So here’s the challenge.
If you want the right to claim your organization is somehow more pleasing to Jesus because you are worshiping “simply”, then turn off the HVAC, close the doors on your building, put the donation box out front to catch the tithes, and send your “members” out into the community to worship like Jesus would have worshiped.
Not like Paul. Not like Peter. Like Jesus.
Wash a few stinky feet.
Or a lot of stinky feet.
In the flats.
And on the drug trafficking street.
When we all pull our heads out of our selfish arses and finally recognize the point Jesus was trying to make, then I will consider re-associating myself with a group of worshipers.
Meanwhile, if you happen to decide to do something for the poor, the hurting, the sick, call me. I’d love to help.
Funny thing is, when and if that ever happens, there may not be an organized group with which to associate. Somehow I don’t think it is possible to be like Jesus and be a part of organized religion.
We call that thar comparison an oxy-moron. (insert best hillbilly accent here)
Any takers?
Good luck with that.
*******************************************************
PS: The likely author of that pamphlet has my love and respect for caring enough to try to make a difference. My post is not intended to be a shot at the him/her, but rather a desperate attempt to draw attention to the lameness of what we insist on doing in the name of religion. Don’t claim to be doing it like Jesus, if you ain’t-a gonna do it like Jesus.
PPS: Here’s an interesting link that relates a bit: http://www.angelsghosts.com/who_do_you_worship.html
Peace out.
I’ll Have What He’s Smokin’
My sweet husband coined a phrase a few years back when he met my …uh…. interesting is a good word…..OB/GYN for the first time. I was preggo with gorgeous model #2 and it was my first time to have a baby with a “big city” doc. My doc was simply amazing, but he had a funny way of snorting whenever he laughed. As we left, in response to my, “Well…????” inquiry, hubby simply said, “I don’t know what he’s smokin’, but I want some.”
I’ve never forgotten that moment.
It’s etched in my psyche for all eternity.
And at (in)appropriate moments, it comes leaping out of my mouth.
Yesterday was just such a day. Having delivered a car to gorgeous model #1 at the far edges of Western New Mexico, I participated in a game of “how to get from Nowhere, NM back to my warm, inviting home with no car.
It involved two shuttles and two different airplanes, a two hour ride with a most…ahem…”interesting” driver (that’s an experience I shan’t soon forget), and a Southwest flight attendant crew who changed planes with me.
If you’ve never flown Southwest, you should. Connan O’Brian’s got nothing on these people. Plus, no terrorist would ever fly Southwest for fear of a redneck takeover.
“We don’t anticipate a drop in cabin pressure. If we did, we wouldn’t have come to work today.”
“Oxygen will be delivered to you through the mask. First three minutes are free. Additional minutes are priceless.”
“If you are traveling with small children, or if one is sitting beside you, you have our sympathy.”
“In the event of a water evacuation, put on the life vest from beneath your seat, pull the cord to inflate, and kick, kick, paddle, paddle, breath. Kick, Kick, paddle, paddle, breath…..until you reach the shore.”
“This is a non-smoking flight. If you feel the need to light up, please step out on the wing and enjoy our feature presentation, ‘Gone With the Wind’.”
“We will now dim the cabin lights. That’s in order to enhance the looks of the (dark complected) male flight attendant.” (He was the one who said all of this.)
“On behalf of the entire Southwest crew, I’d like to welcome you to Hawaii, but I can’t, so welcome to Lubbock.”
I’ll have some of whatever he’s smoking. I bet it’s good stuff.
I “deplaned” (insert midget voice from Fantasy Island here) and greeted the hunk who had repeatedly provided the necessary genetic material (and some great sex) required to produce gorgeous models #1, #2, #3, and #4. We watched as an old guy grabbed my bag off the luggage carousel by mistake. I commented to my hubby that his wife was gonna freak when he got home with a suitcase full of women’s underwear. Quick thinking hunky babe that he is, the father of my children commented that wasn’t anything compared to what she’d do to him when she found the inflatable mattress packed inside with those underwear.
Fortunately he learned to read luggage tags quickly.
Divorce averted.
Hubby, wife, and two younger gorgeous models climbed inside a 94 Chevy Suburban Dallas Cowboy package vehicle and headed home. A varsity volleyball match and a religious crusade awaited us back in the big town of Smallville.
The volleyball match was…er…uh….soon over.
The crusade preacher was quite focused and…uh….preachy. We didn’t have to go to the football field. We could easily hear him from the Wellness Center.
Am I the only one that has visions of murderous blood baths upon hearing the term “crusade”?
Hubby mentioned counting the number of references to hell, death, etc. the night before. I heard a few myself.
I’ve also heard this crusade cost as much as what my house appraised for. Don’t know if it is true, yet if so, it’s a bit disturbing. That much money would feed a lot of Dump People in Honduras.
I admire those who put it together. Too often in this town, we tend to see barriers instead of hurdles. For hurdling over seemingly insurmountable barriers, those organizers have my admiration and respect.
Yet I can’t help but wonder what this investment accomplished? Did anyone demonstrate or imitate the life of Jesus through this project? Or was it more recruiting for the religion known as Christianity? A religion that tends to focus on proselytizing over serving.
I just don’t know. I wasn’t there. I didn’t hear that much. Not overly interested in hearing any more of it. Therefore, I have no right to judge the motives, intentions, actions, or hearts of those who participated.
Here’s what I do know. There was supposedly a man who walked the earth for 33 or so very short years. He went around healing those who were hurting, teaching about how to live a peaceful happy life, and feeding hungry people. Crowds followed him everywhere. He tried to escape occasionally, because the needs of the people were very draining. He didn’t walk around telling them how they were gonna go to hell if they didn’t go see John the Baptist to get every square millimeter of their body dunked under water.
Other than the twelve he picked out for his man-posse, from what I read, he didn’t recruit much at all.
He didn’t have to.
Everyone wanted whatever it was he was smoking.
That’s how Jesus-Following should be….everyone looking at the life of a person and simply saying, “I want whatever s/he’s having.”
No revival.
No crusade.
Simply an incredible example of caring about people.
There’s no need to proselytize. When the student is ready, the teacher appears.
Now, if this crusade guy decides he needs a massage today, we just won’t mention this little blog, okay?
Sssshhhhhhh!!!!!
Keeping it Simple
A recent reminder to “love the sinner, hate the sin” triggered my thinking about what constitutes sin and who gets to label something a sin. After all, we’ve taken great liberties in this country (and specifically in this part of the country) to weave into our many local, state, and national laws the conservative Christian beliefs that have consumed our religious lives.
Dear Thomas Jefferson, we are butchering your constitution. Sincerely, Us.
The aforementioned reminder was in reference to a conversation in which I revealed that I no longer accept the idea that monogamous homosexual relationships are sinful. There have been a number of factors that have contributed to my change in views, not the least of which was related to my experience with a beautiful human being most would call an hermaphrodite. “She” had breasts. “She” also had a full beard complete with five o’clock shadow. My heart broke for her and the agony she must have experienced throughout her life. She was a bit more difficult than others around us to fully accept.
Even at 41 years old, I sucked at being a decent human being to her.
In the same group of very cool people was the funniest guy I think I’ve ever met. He was a bit on the goofy side with a deep love for all things related to The Little Mermaid. As everyone became closer to one another, he revealed his preference to date males rather than females. At the risk of stereotyping, I totally saw that one coming. Much about him suggested this might be the case. He was somehow created with tendencies that pushed him in that direction. I witnessed his devastated and totally broken heart when one of his relationships crumbled. His pain was no different than what I experienced during my dating years.
Towards the end of my experience with these two people, I encountered a college acquaintance on Facebook. I more or less sought him out after a mutual friend shared with me the things he was doing with his life and how similar they were to things I wanted to do with my own. She also shared with me that his significant other was male. Again, thinking back, and again risking stereotyping, I wasn’t surprised. I am so glad I sought him out. He has blessed me in ways he’ll probably never know.
There are others, too numerous to mention here. A high school classmate. A seven year old boy in my PE class. Some girls I knew growing up. Something about them suggests the programming was there all along. If that’s the case, then suggesting that following their heart and finding the perfect lifelong companion is sinful also suggests that God screwed up. REALLY screwed up.
These same people will suggest that God doesn’t make mistakes.
Or maybe it wasn’t God. Maybe it was the devil that caused these “abnormalities”.
Sorry. Not buying that one either. That would suggest that we have a God that allows people to be set up for failure and misery in this life. It would imply that God doesn’t accept two people who care deeply for one another, are committed to each other for life, and who model and demonstrate a love and compassion for other human beings in ways many heterosexuals have yet to figure out. It also messes with that theory of free will.
It also got me to thinking about who decided to make homosexuality a sin….an abomination for those who seem to passionately love that word. As Christians, we honor a deity known as God and his human form self known as Jesus Christ. Supposedly we don’t worship Moses or Peter or Paul, so their words would simply be a suggestion rather than an edict. Only the words of God and Jesus should be applicable in deciding this question.
That requires getting back to the core of our belief system. For most, those roots are in the Ten Commandments and in the words of Jesus found in the New Testament books of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John.
Jesus kept it pretty simple. He said, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength, and love your neighbor as yourself.”
God was a little more demanding, but still stayed on the non-complex side of things: No other gods, no idols, no taking his name in vain, rest up once a week, honor your parents, don’t murder, steal, lie, be jealous of what others have, don’t take another man’s wife, and don’t be doing the adultery thing.
Pretty simple stuff.
Good advice for how to be a decent human being.
Nothing about homosexuality.
Nothing.
Which leads me to Jesus’ encounter with the woman caught in adultery and the woman at the well who had experienced various men in her lifetime. In neither case did Jesus condemn them. He sent them on their way to live their lives peacefully. He both showed and allowed them to experience love. He didn’t demand the woman at the well leave her latest squeeze and live a life of remorseful solitude.
He loved them. Yes, he also told them not to sin. Yet he does not indicate that their relationships are their sin. Maybe I’m being too technical. The point is, he did not condemn them.
The other point is men wrote the series of texts we have bound together and called the Bible. Men chose what would go into it. Men chose what would be excluded from it. Men proclaimed a part of God’s creation to be a mistake.
Men.
Human Men.
With Human baggage and ideals.
Not God men.
It’s time to stop condemning good and beautiful people who just happen to prefer the company of those of the same sex based on the writings of angry men from three thousand years ago. It’s time to let go of the fear we have for something we don’t understand and allow them to live their lives with the same rights and freedoms available to the pious, (and sometimes murderous) religious right-wing extremists.
It’s time to just….
Allow.
Accept.
Love.
As for me? What can I say? I really like the opposite sex.
I like men….even gay men.
Permission Granted
Are you tired of always doing “it” the “right” way? Have you always wanted to march to the beat of your own drum instead of to the beat of other’s expectations?
Here’s what you’ve been looking for:
Danielle LaPorte’s Permission Slip from the Universe
Permisson granted. Now go live.
Why Do You Believe?
Last night, I revealed some of my current beliefs to an acquaintance with whom I hadn’t encountered in over 20 years. It was one of those moments when a person realizes another has adopted a much softer religious stance than either of us possessed growing up, and opportunities to share possible commonalities were immediately present…
….maybe even needed.
The church stuff is deep-rooted. Classic responses to age-old dilemas.
Because the Bible tells us so.
Hate the sin, love the sinner.
I greatly appreciate the opportunity to stretch my thinking. Every encounter like this forces me to ask the question, “Why do I believe it is this way?”
It also makes me wonder why the other person believes the way they do. Is it because that’s just how they grew up? Is it because they believe the Bible has some magical protected sacred accuracy? Is it because that’s what they’ve always been told to believe?
I come from a religious world where questioning is both encouraged and condemned. Some things are ripe for questioning, discussion, and debate. Others are totally off limits. Questioning the authority of the Bible is one of those “off limits” areas. It’s like one of those unmentionables. You are supposed to simply accept that the Bible is the ultimate accurate authority on everything from when to commune to the assumption of homosexuality as a sin.
To which I say again, which Bible is the authority?
Why do you believe that?
And why do you believe THAT?
And on what do you base THAT belief?
If at any point in this series of why questions, a person arrives at an answer resembling “…just because…”, then we have arrived at the core problem. Most of us don’t really know WHY we believe something. We just do because we are supposed to.
Because anything else triggers fear of the assumed punishment.
…the place that didn’t really exist until “The Church” needed to keep its followers loyal.
…a place designed and embellished by artists under the influence of said “Church”.
Ask yourself, “Why?”
“Why do I believe this to be true?”
The real answers may surprise you.
